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London-based freelance journo (mainly film & TV), content writer & editor, ghostwriter, and blogger. Also currently studying to be a UX writer.

Although not without its painful pitfalls, ditching the desk for a smartphone is the way forward. I wrote this blog on mine & here’s why…

A bump on my forehead that’s a real museum piece and repetitive strain injury in my wrist and hands so acute you’d easily mistake me for a pubescent teen. These are the first signs of physical trauma to show from my latest WFH evolution, WFP (working from phone).

As if crumbling mental health and staggering weight gain aren’t already enough to contend with, I’m now craggy and achy. But it’s my bad. I’m the fool who precariously suspends a 200-gram object (the weight of an adult Syrian hamster, only less fluffy) above my head in bed. …


George R.R. Martin calls editors “the writer’s natural enemy,” but some of these pros are great. What sets them apart from their thoughtless counterparts?

Picture the scene: You’re at home in the kitchen. After toiling for hours to prepare a gourmet feast, it’s time to down that trusty wooden spoon. Sure, your dish might need a pinch of this and a dash of that before serving, but it’s pretty much done. Happy with the day’s culinary efforts, you pour a celebratory glass of wine and take a load off. Then in comes your partner, who tastes the food, grimaces, tips it onto the floor, and squirts bleach on top — all before commanding, with a smile, that you “fix it.”

You wouldn’t stand for…


Are pandemic hook-ups irresponsible? Or can people put it about as they please?

With his peroxide shock and plummy twaddle, Boris Johnson would put even the randiest horndog off sex at the best of times — quite frankly, I have no clue how Carrie Symonds does it.

But in the Covid era, our fearless leader has literally made it illegal for UK residents to find the juicy peach to their throbbing aubergine, or vice versa — unless, of course, these real-life emojis exist within a sanctioned support bubble.

Outlawing lockdown sex between people not in an “established relationship” (as Johnson and his spads put it) is probably a wise decision, especially with this…


How ‘Schitt’s Creek’ legend Moira Rose indirectly taught me the best way to tackle cultural appropriation

Moira Rose is the bread to my butter. I said as much on Twitter yesterday after seeing the Queen of Schitt’s Creek announce, in her trademark faux British accent:

“I don’t know who I am from one moment to the next.”

More than ever during lockdown, the sentiment speaks to me, and so I named Moira my “spirit animal.” The move rightly displeased one follower (who uses gender-neutral pronouns). They commented:

“I adore Moira too. But just so you know, the concept of spirit animals is a Native-only thing many have spoken on and asked non-Natives not to use.”

I…


No gun laws and easy targets. It’s all fun and games until you realise what digital death represents…

Today, I shot a woman! I shot a woman in cold blood, for the first time ever. I did it not because she threatened me or hurt me or anything like that, but because she was there. And I didn’t like the look of her. And just because I could — with impunity too. How often can a person get away with femicide? Actually, in reality, quite a lot— nonetheless, that’s why I travelled here this morning, where killing’s a game.

The sweaty lass was dressed in worn pleather sandals, baby-pink knee-high socks with white frills at the top, and…


Sick of tech? Enjoy snail mail? A total dork? Look no further than the nerdiest pen pal club in town

Last month, I joined the International Geek Girl Pen Pals Club (IGGPPC). Nope…I never thought I’d see those words flow from my fingertips either. I can’t help but wonder what the somewhat cool 21-year-old Steven might think of this. You know what though, who gives a hoot? His dweeby successor pushes the buttons now.

However, with IGGPPC, there will be no pushing of any buttons. No siree! For this is one pen pal club all about the snail mail. In fact, its founding “Unicorns,” Farquharson and Stewie, say the club is where “geek and snail mail collide.” And although that’s…


Why you should always grab the chance to say goodbye before a family member passes — even if you don’t get along!

When you wake to three missed calls from your father and a text message from your brother saying “Dad’s trying to get hold of you, can you give him a bell?” without explaining why…you know something’s up. So, that was my morning, and a return call to my dad confirmed my worst suspicions: my granny had suddenly passed away.

Divided by distance and difference, my granny and I weren’t especially close, so I don’t seek sympathy here. …


How a stylish sexagenarian led me to question whether I have anything to say that no one else can say better

Ever heard of Tutti Bennett? Na, neither had I until I met her daughter Sonia (my friend’s kooky flatmate) last year. At a party, Sonia led me to her mum’s colourful Instagram page, and it was love at first sight. She might just be the coolest lady I’ve ever seen. And I once spotted the Queen in person, so that’s quite the statement.

Part of Ari Seth Cohen’s Advanced Style project, which you might know from his documentary of the same name, Tutti is an eccentric 60-something Aussie “rewriting beauty on her own terms.” It comes as little surprise Cohen…


How the trailblazing broadcaster used a deepfake Queen Elizabeth to highlight society’s misinformation problem

One presumably knows that it is incredibly rare to see the Queen break into a basic smile, let alone a fancy tabletop jig. But thanks to technology, viewers got to witness both of these marvels on Christmas day.

Following the British monarch’s usual Christmas speech, shown on both the BBC and ITV, Channel 4 delivered its own festive message. There’s nothing strange about that, with the broadcaster airing an alternative every year. …


Some words on why we should be allies to non-binary people and a few ways we can go about this super simple task

A friend recently “came out” as non-binary. For anybody still in the dark about what it means to be non-binary (or genderqueer, bigender, genderfluid, or agender) then please watch this short and sweet video from 15-year-old Micah.

Clued up now? Kays, let’s get this show on the road.

So, after years of society-induced confusion, my friend ventured out of the closet, past all the ruffles and ruches of their old gendered clothing. They did so with some trepidation though, concerned about what kind of reception might await them on the other side of the door. …

Steven Allison

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